Endings and Beginnings

Starting a new phase of school life means the end of something too.

Key points:

Whether it’s the end of toddler-dom and the start of pre-school, or the end of the primary years before high school begins, there are joys, sorrows and opportunities, a time for everything.

It doesn’t seem very long ago that my son finished pre-school. Vivid memories of the last Christmas concert, the final parent gathering, the day he wore his school uniform to pre-school linger long in my mind. Happy moments before his school years began.

This little boy is eighteen now, has just finished his final HSC exam and is about to go through another transition. There will be no more school uniforms or concerts, lunch boxes or school emails. As a door closes behind, the world is opening up in front of him. What does that mean for me as his parent?

How do we prepare?

Whether your child’s new chapter is pre-school, high school or something else, there will be change for you and for them. They won’t always be able to articulate what it means. By taking a curious and open approach, you can provide the practical and emotional support they need to navigate their new world.

Listen and show you are there in the tough moments too.

Saying goodbye matters

Children have long memories. Taking the time to say goodbye to friends and teachers, to acknowledge the last time in that classroom or playground can ease the transition. Acknowledging and validating their feelings can help them process any loss. Be specific about what they want to celebrate. Take photos of the small moments and the big ones.

Not every memory will be a happy one. Listen and show you are there in the tough moments too. It’s in the challenges that we grow the most, but they can be painful memories, especially when we’re young and working ourselves out.

Make the time

Plan ahead and create space in your own schedule to be there. By being there for the final assembly, you will share in the moment and show your child they matter.

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Whether it’s one event or a whole week of celebrations, they all count. If you can, be there. These will be the shared memories you can look back on together later.

If you can’t make it in person, there might be a live stream or recording you can watch later. You could ask a family member to attend in your place, or another child’s parent to be your rep. Make sure your child knows the event is important to you, even if you can’t be there in person.

An eighteen-year-old can look big on the outside but still be full of questions and self-doubt on the inside

Be curious

Your child is about to have a fresh start. Make the time to talk with them about what they’re looking forward to, their expectations, hopes and dreams. Even little ones have thoughts about what’s happening next.

Think about what they need from you now. An eighteen-year-old can look big on the outside but still be full of questions and self-doubt on the inside. Leave them to make their own breakfast but be there for their questions and when they need a chat.

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while you might miss it.”

Celebrate

Make a cake. Organise a dinner. Take a trip. Do whatever works for your child. Together you can celebrate what has been and what is yet to come.

As Ferris Bueller says, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while you might miss it.”

Set your child up to leap into the next phase of life full in the knowledge that whatever happens, you will be there cheering them on.

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