Should I Talk to My Kids About Porn?

When did you first learn about pornography?

Key points:

Was it something you were exposed to at a young age? Saw on TV?

Maybe the subject was off limits in your family, and you relied on the internet to examine supposed pros and cons.

In a report shared by the Australian and New Zealand Journal of Public Health, a study of 15–29-year-olds found 100% of boys and young men, and 82% of girls and young women, reported ever viewing pornography.

The median age for first exposure was 13 years for boys and 16 for girls.

Author and mum of four Greta Eskridge believes parents need to begin the conversation about pornography earlier with their children, so they’re prepared before “first exposure”.

It’s Time to Talk to Your Kids About Porn provides conversational guides to have with your kids – from 6-year-olds through to teens .

“It has an impact,” Greta said.

“What we consume – whether it’s the food we eat or the things that we watch – it has an impact on us and the way we act.

Hope 103.2 is proudly supported by

“It has an impact on our health: our physical health in the case of food [and our] mental and emotional health in the case of the things that we’re watching.”

Growing up in a Christian home in the 80’s and 90’s Greta’s family didn’t “talk about sex hardly at all – and especially not pornography” and the consequences of that made her unaware of how much it can impact intimate relationships.

“Pornography wasn’t available everywhere like it is now,” Great said.

“We as parents [now] have to approach it so differently than my parents did with me.”

12 years into Greta’s marriage her husband confessed to a porn addiction, prompting the couple to better equip their kids to understand healthy relationships and why objectification in pornography is problematic.

“If [violent sexual acts] are what you’re seeing happening, that’s what you think you’re supposed to do,” Greta said.

“And that’s what you think the girl is supposed to want.

“Nobody’s telling you different if that’s your education.”

Greta’s book It’s Time to Talk to Your Kids About Porn provides conversational guides to have with your kids – from 6-year-olds through to teens – to make the topic less intimidating.

Greta doesn’t want to shame interest in sexual activity but instead present the benefits of exploring it in the safety of a committed relationship.

“You want to address [pornography] with them before first exposure,” Greta said.

“By saying nothing, the greater risk is them seeing something and being underprepared.”

Importantly Greta doesn’t want to shame interest in sexual activity but instead present the benefits of exploring it in the safety of a committed relationship with knowledge of God’s intent for sex.

“The response to sexual things is God-given,” Greta said.

“We were designed and created to have a sexual response, to be sexually attracted and to have sex – sex is not bad.

“However, there’s a difference between ‘traditional sexual activity’ between two partners, two humans, and sex with a person on a screen.

“The way it impacts your brain and your body and your whole psyche, they’re very different, and [kids] need to understand the difference”

Greta Eskridge’s book It’s Time to Talk to Your Kids About Porn is out now.

Listen to the full episode of UNDISTRACTED with guest Greta Eskridge in the player above or wherever you get your podcasts.

Header image: photos by CanvaPro