Psychologist on What 'MAFS' Gets Right about Marriage and Relationships - Hope 103.2

Psychologist on What ‘MAFS’ Gets Right about Marriage and Relationships

Sydney psychologist Christina O'Connell developed a dating program to help people find what a TV show turns into pop culture entertainment.

By Ben McEachenThursday 16 Feb 2023Hope MorningsRelationshipsReading Time: 2 minutes

Sydney psychologist Christina O’Connell was inspired by Married at First Sight, unexpectedly in a good way.

“I was watching MAFS a couple of seasons ago and I got hooked, like many Australians,” Christina told Hope Mornings.

“I thought to myself, ‘What if we did this properly?

“What if we actually helped people to find love?”

Christina created Dating with Purpose, a program to prepare people with skills and tools for seeking committed relationships.

Into its 10th season, Married at First Sight continues to dominate free-to-air ratings with its gimmick of two people marrying without previously meeting.

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As these couples proceed to actually get to know each other – and have regular “commitment ceremonies” after their vows were stated – MAFS pulls in millions of viewers each week, generating a lot of news stories, notifications and posts of scandals and shocking revelations.

MAFS gets what people crave

While it can be easy to trash MAFS – even fans love to hate on this successful show – Christina agrees that it taps into the common human need for connection and commitment.

“I actually think loneliness is the silent epidemic that is happening,” Christina said.

“Loneliness is the silent epidemic that is happening,” – Christina O’Connell, Sydney psychologist

“We live in such a society where we are like silos; post-COVID [restrictions], even more so.

“It makes sense that we are leaning into close relationships and we are wanting commitment and safety.

“And we are wanting authentic relationships, where we can be vulnerable and real with the other.”

Aim for the opposite of MAFS’ lack of pre-marriage preparation

Like many have across the past decade, Christina questioned the motivation of people who signed up to MAFS.

If they are genuinely seeking love and dedicated partnership, Christina is fine with that – good on them if they want to do that in front of Australia, Christina added.

But she is not a fan of people faking their commitment on screen just to get famous.

She is not a fan of people faking their commitment on screen just to get famous.

Whatever the motivation of a MAFS spouse, Christina said the lack of pre-marriage preparation on the show should encourage the opposite in us.

“I love the idea of doing a marriage preparation course that is psychologically sound,” Christina said.

“It’s hard to be vulnerable and often we need structures around us to encourage and help us to be brave. To be real.

“To have those real connections and hard conversations.”

Listen to the full interview with Christina O’Connell in the player above.