How Bad is Your Cabin Fever? Check Duncan's Official Rating Scale - Hope 103.2

How Bad is Your Cabin Fever? Check Duncan’s Official Rating Scale

It may be quite some time until we get out of this isolation predicament. So Duncan from Hope Breakfast has instituted a Cabin Fever Rating system...

By Duncan RobinsonMonday 6 Apr 2020Hope BreakfastParentingReading Time: 2 minutes

Let’s talk frankly: it may be quite some time until we get out of this isolation predicament.

My eyebrow is twitching just a little at that prospect, so I felt that, similar to the bushfire rating system, we might institute a Cabin Fever Rating Scale: something simple that every Hopelander can use to clearly communicate how they are feeling.

I don’t consider myself an expert at this, but I felt it might look a little something like this, following five simple codes:

Level 1 – Code Green-Fields

Everything is fine, not a problem, smooth sailing. We are rock-stars in the world of isolation.

Level 2 – Code Banana Blender

I wouldn’t say there are cracks, but the house is starting to get messy. Things have not turned; apart from the usual weirdness here at home we are okay. I am, however, approaching the end of my things-to-do ideas, and my wits.

Level 3 – Code Tuna Milkshake

Things have taken a turn for the worse, the wheels are starting to come off and it’s getting officially weird. The internet has slowed and there are now 97 devices connected. I haven’t showered today, but I don’t think anyone has noticed.​

Level 4 – Code Crimson Tide

Okay, it’s getting sketchy – the kids have formed a tribe with war paint on their faces, they are setting up an independent dictatorship, and have stolen the remote. Just like the movie, I think there is some secret underwater military espionage going on at home. Please help.

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Level 5 – Code Magenta Hurricane

We have a full-blown isolation catastrophe looming. Personal cardboard forts have been built and we are in a full-scale mental apocalypse. Send help immediately. The kids have eaten through the entire pantry and are now eating dry Sao’s; it’s awful.

Level 6 – Code Indigo Midnight

Raging dumpster fire underway…Comm-nicat–n…..Patchy….Situa–n……Critica…..

So where are you on the Cabin Fever Rating right now? I’m at Banana Blender: we’re still all good, but things are definitely getting unclean…