By Fred Porter
Porn. I hate porn. I think it’s one of the biggest tools of the enemy in our current time. The amount of people viewing it is alarming.
The amount of Christian leaders consuming it is saddening (no judgment from me, I battled that filthy addiction for six years between 2008–2013). You can read the nitty gritty of my own personal story in ‘Confessions of a Misfit Pastor’s kid‘.
Talking with my wife about it last week she was in tears and asked, “how can we help a generation, how can we help Christian leaders, how can we help pastors battling this thing!” I have some thoughts below.
I know the depths of being a slave to this thing, but I also know the fresh air of freedom as God’s grace (and some hard work and practical steps) helped me break free!
1. We have to talk about it
We have to open this topic up in our churches – in our teams – in our families. Porn viewing is like mould. It grows in the dark. Let’s shine a light on this thing.
2. We have to remove fear of judgment
I have conversations with leaders and pastors who private message me because they have huge fear and shame about going to their up-lines or leaders. We must create spaces for repentance, confession, prayer, etc. We know it’s wrong, but removing the fear of judgment creates room for solution.
3. It’s not going to just “go away”
I don’t want to be negative or discourage any young man or woman. However, if you do what you always have done, you will get the same result. Porn isn’t going to leave because of your good intent or the fact you are getting married. My goodness, today is as good as any day to talk to someone. Today is a good day to have that hard talk with your wife. Today is a good day to take action. I know many who at 17 said “it’s just a now thing” and a decade later that thing hasn’t moved. Let’s act now!
4. Educate yourself
When you realise the facts about the porn industry it’s a sobering thing to be a “part” of and make no mistake, through viewing porn you are a part of the “demand” part of the industry. Even the secular viewpoint is now starting to realise the adverse effects of this industry and of consuming it.
5. Let people look at your phone often
This one may sound simple. But if you know a spouse, a friend, a pastor who can look at your phone at any time it’s a practical way to help! Because if you race to clear your Safari history and cookies it’s an alarm bell to those you have allowed into your life. Yes, we are getting very real. I am sick of this thing.
6. This is a hard, sometimes, long walk
Can we just acknowledge this? It’s going to take time. It is a legitimate addiction. I have to say I have seen a few people receive prayer and, boom, that was it. But most of the time it’s a walk of accountability… devotion… honesty – some bumps in the road. This has to be OK. Let’s not throw rocks at people walking back to the Father’s house on the prodigal road.
“We had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.”
7. It’s never ever too late
Just before COVID, I discussed and prayed with a 70 year old about his many decade battle with porn. He felt so alone and ashamed. It had cost him his marriage and a percentage of his relationship with his kids. I had the honour of hopefully stirring the fires of hope for a new day and the fresh air of progress.
I am sick of porn affecting people in my world and ministry. Let’s kick this thing back to hell.
Article supplied with thanks to Sabrina Peters.
About the Author: Fred Porter is the Youth and Young Adult’s Pastor of Kingdom Culture Church, based in Brisbane, Australia. He is married to his best friend, Anna and is on a mission to point people to Jesus and impact a generation.